I was walking along the Ganges River when I came across 8 men carrying a body wrapped in white linen. They were walking to the rivers edge where they placed the body on a metal rack. No alter. No ceremonial markings. We weren’t near a gaht or a temple. I watched as 5 of the men shoved wood under the rack then walked away. One of the remaining men poured butter over the body and then shoved hay in with the wood. There were cows and goats walking past and no ceremony, no commemoration, no words. I sat watching in disbelief. This was happening. No privacy. No gathering. I haven’t seen any men in India with their head shaved. Only men performing this ritual shave their head as a sign of mourning. So I knew when I saw the bald headed man approach the body that it was his son. He knelt down with a burning stick and as he lit the fire he wailed in sorrow. The scream was loud and radiated pain. He fell back and watched as the fire began. The butter kept the body and robe from igniting as the fire grew. One of the other men stoked the fire as the son sat watching. I couldn’t imagine lighting a dead family member on fire alone on the side of a river with people walking by only feet away. I sat off to the side almost hidden being as discreet as possible. I saw people stopping to take pictures and selfies. Indian people. It was as though it was entertaining to them. The son sat alone as the body ignited, burned and slowly disintegrated. Hours past before the fire burned out. At this point the man took what few bones remained of his father and he swept them into the river to float away alongside dead cows, children swimming and men bathing.
No matter how far you travel, some things still grab you in ways that words cant describe. As I tried to imagine this man’s life and how it could all end this way, I realized I’m a traveler and not a tourist. Most of what I have seen and will take away from India came far from any tourist attractions. In a month I’ve experienced culture shock, poverty, pollution, noises, smells and a quality of life I never imagined. I have no regrets about coming here. Many of you have reached out saying you could never travel here. I completely understand. This isn’t a vacation. It’s definitely not easy. And at times I was ready to give up and head for the nearest airport. I’ve hit the top 5 places I wanted to see and have decided that the rest will have to be another trip. Maybe 2 trips. I feel if I stay longer now, the negatives will overshadow the positive. The pollution, noise and rudeness can test even Buddha’s patience. I’ve decide to leave on a high note and head to one of my favorite places in the world to recharge. I will return to India. It’s made me grow and I’ve learned so much. But it’s time to leave.
Tomorrow when I get to the land of smiles I plan to shower 5 times, do my laundry twice, eat a cow for lunch and a pig for dinner. Then I’ll be ready for another adventure.
